UNTITLED

Jim, dear sweet Jim,
I need your help.
I'm in hell.
Better yet, I'm in a hole
in which I can't dig myself out of.
First of all, I’m giving up.
Giving up in skool.
I hate my Algebra II teacher.
He sucks.
History is fun but I'm not doing well in it.
My history teacher loves me though.
And I love him as well.
He makes History much easier and so much more interesting.
The problem is me.
I can’t get the facts straight.
Chemistry is really hard.
Especially for a late night punk like me.
I study.
I fail.
I don’t study.
I fail.
What am I doing wrong?
Everything's falling apart.
Especially me.
I've changed. . . a lot.
But in some of the wrong ways.
But then again in some of the right ways.
And in good ways.
I'm free and I can think for myself.
But I'm a blunt bitch and think of myself as intimidating.
I'm a blunt bitch with so much self confidence.
I'm getting help.
But it’s not helping.
It’s just a bunch of crap.
If there's one person who's a big help in my life,
it’s you, babe.
I cant tell you how much how much I miss you.
I cant live a day without thinking about you.
My life is falling apart
and each day I lose something or someone important.
Like friends for example.
I hate the teachers; most of them at least.
I hate the kiss-asses too.
They suck.
They remind me of EIGHTH GRADERS.
Stupid people that get on my nerves.
You’re one of the only ones now.
All my “friends” have gone insane.
Sex and drugs.
That’s all the world has in store today.
And the people who do them.
Boy are they gonna pay.
I know I’m no straight edge myself
with all the subordinancy
but at least I’m sane.
I’m losing all sanity little by little,
day by day.
By going to skool.
That’s what I think it is.
I lose more by coming home
and being around family.
When I’m in my room
I rock. I jam. I do what I want.
Yes, I play guitar now.
Enjoying it too.
It’s the only thing that helps me stay sane.
My guitar and I.
We get together
and get a kick out of life.
Me and him.
We’re free and we make a good team.
I strum, he speaks.
He takes me to other worlds when I’m down.
When he’s flat,
I tune him up.
We scratch each other’s back.
And when we get to the good life,
To hell, we’re not coming back.
When I learn more about my guitar
and he learns more about me
we’re gonna be stars I tell ya.
That means no more skool
and it means freedom.
When I’m not playing guitar,
my hormones are outta control.
Horniness and anger comes.
That’s when I get on the net to calm myself down.
And the hormones.
Either that or I sleep.
Sleep takes me away.
Me and my guitar are together in those dreams.
Sometimes.
Me and you are together in those dreams.
Sometimes.
We’re all in those dreams at one time or another.
Will that dream come true?
You pray and I will play.
And maybe we’ll catch something.
Someday.

                          What It’s All About

I hate school.
I hate life.
I hate both Algebra teachers.
They suck.
Nobody likes what I like
and that’s what I want.
Kind of.
But all they do is nag.
Nag. Nag. Nag.
Am I taking it to personally?
Maybe. Maybe not.
who gives?
I love Spanish.
I love Jim Carrey.
I love my music.
They rule.
They’re kind to me.
Nobody else likes them
and that’s what I want.
Kind of.
I love my friends
but then again I hate them.
They’re true
and then they’re not.
They rule
and then they don’t.
They’re funny
and then they annoy me.
ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
I hate the kiss-asses
and I love the teacher haters.
I love Mr. Bacon
with all my heart.
He’s difficult
but he’s the best history teacher I’ve ever had.
I don’t want him to leave
but he seems like he doesn't want to stay.
I can’t do anything about it
so I’ll just try and get over it.
But I can’t because I love him so much.
I love soccer
but I hate playing for school teams.
My tutors turn out to be total morons.
I’m the oxy
and they’re the morons.
I’ve changed
and I like it this way.
Others look at me as a total bitch
but I don’t care.
They can go fly a kite.
Who needs them?
Who doesn’t?
Kill them all.

                             WHY?

I try my hardest
on my tests, quizzes, and homework
But it never pays off.
I study for tests
But it never pays off.
I’m scared
Because. . .
I think about why this is
but it never. . .
comes to mind.
Why do I even bother?
Nothing pays off.
I think I know things
but I’m always wrong.
When things like this happen
you know your life sucks.
I know for a fact I’m not going to college.
I’ll end up going any ways
because. . .
I dunno.
Who cares?
Will everything turn out well in the finish?
How is it going to end?
About myself, will I have to defend?
Will I ever meet Jim Carrey?
I know I’m obsessed with him
and I’m sorry.
If you knew a sweet guy like him
you’d be obsessed too.
I just wanna know where my loved ones are
when I need them most.